Books, books, books. 📚

I mostly regret buying them, reading the first 30 pages, and then never finishing them. My collection of over fifty books is judging me hard from each corner of my living room right now.

#ADHD Life

The thing is, I have way too many interests, and way too many hobbies — and sometimes the flame of one hobby burns too soon. Then I move on to another one.

So, let me walk you through my complicated world of an ADHD brain.

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Imagine you’re watching a TV show — let’s say Lessons in Chemistry. You finish it, great show and all.

Then, not so accidentally, you stumble upon a book called Chemistry for Breakfast. You start it, you like it, it explains so many interesting things, and suddenly you want to know more.

So you go on Amazon and buy Super Simple Chemistry — an awesome visual guide. The day it arrives, you literally cannot put it down. Everything is so new, so bright. Pictures are bringing the science alive in your hands.

The next day, you read 20 pages, still excited, still very motivated to continue. And the day after that, and the day after that.

But then the novelty wears off. You don’t get the same kick from it as you used to. Then you watch an ad, or another movie. And so on, and on, and on. 🔁

And the wicked cycle continues… over and over again.

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So, going back to the books I regret — there are some. Mostly due to the complexity of the language, which throws me off very easily. My brain simply cannot process it unless it’s absolutely necessary.

Like exam prep, or work research. In those cases, it actually works very well — the fear of failing or getting fired gives me just enough dopamine to somehow push through. Otherwise? Dead end.

And please, please — do not throw slippers at me for the next part. 🩴

Naturally, I was not a big fan of many classics, like War and Peace or Crime and Punishment. Same goes for some contemporary books I read for my book club, The Inheritance of Loss being one example. The story was very good — an exceptional depiction of the struggles of immigrants — but it just didn’t do it for me.

So yeah, there are some books I regret, for sure. I won’t lie about it. But hopefully there will be far fewer of those in the future, as I’m learning to understand what I actually like — and spending less time on what I don’t. ✨